On conversing with the voices one day, asking questions as to what I had to do and what was happening in my life, trying to make sense of everything I was going through, as well as us as a race and planet the voices were telling me to just be, just be!
But when you have the symptoms I have and had back then, relaxing and being, are not the easiest if at all possible things to do. And what does just being mean I thought, we always have to do, to strive, to pursue something or another, direction, purpose!
By this point of life I had come across meditation and what are called chakras, by reading certain books. In fact, I had come across a whole plethora of spiritual techniques and practices. But they all seemed too hard, too irrational or too far out!
So yeah I was essentially talking to voices that no one else could hear, but still had a semblance of rationale or logical thinking in my mind!
I would like to point out that many of the voices I hear are not just voices as such, but are a form of communication that uses colour, feeling, and images and is like being inside a hologram of sorts, a virtual reality simulation superimposed over the reality around you. It is hard to explain.
But on one occasion whilst in this state of mind where I was hearing and seeing things, there was an image of an ant, and a feeling to really focus on it.
The ant was walking on an apple and the voice asked me if I thought the ant knew it was on an apple, to which I replied no. How could the ant know it was on a round apple, it would just be bumbling along!?
Then the image zoomed out and the apple was attached to a tree, and the voice asked if I thought the ant knew if it was on an apple attached to a tree, again I said no.
The image zoomed out and showed the tree was on an island in an ocean. The voice asking me if the ant knew it was on an apple, on a tree on an island, in an ocean. Again I said no.
The image zoomed further out and showed the planet Earth from space. Again the voice asked me if I thought the ant knew if it was on an apple attached to a tree, on an island, on a planet, again I said no.
Then the image zoomed out to the solar system, then too the galaxy, and then the universe and to something I didn’t recognise and the feeling was like a huge vibration running through my body and head and there was a bright light!
Then I was back watching the ant again, and the voice again asked if the ant thought it knew it was on a round apple, I didn’t answer straight away, I remember thinking what the heck just happened what was that last image I saw, what was that vibration? The ant continued to walk around the apple and started drinking juice from an abrasion on the apple. The vision was zoomed right in on the ant’s head as it drank this liquid.
The voice asked do you think the ant knows this is what you call a sugar, I said I don’t know.
The vision zoomed into the liquid and the voice asked if I thought the ant I knew that sugar was a carbohydrate, I replied no.
The vision zoomed in more to where there were things, balls and sparks dancing and moving around.
Do you think the ant knows the carbohydrate is made of molecules, atoms, said the voice. I said no looking at the absurdity of it.
Then the image began to zoom in more where again there was a vibration all through my body a rushing sensation and a bright light. And I was back in the room.
The voice said the ant is just being, just be, don’t trouble my mind with things I can’t comprehend and just be. Find my natural way and like the ant, just be.
I got what I was being shown, that there were some questions I will never know the answer to.
Some things are just ineffable!
But the world was in great turmoil and trouble, how can just being change or help anything I thought? I need to get better and I need to do something to make this world a better place.
The ant vision never left me, and when at times when I was stressing over big things or things that I perceived as big, or even small things, I would see the ant on the apple and feel a moment’s peace and calm. It wasn’t till many years later in life that I understood this vision more clearly.
